Charity | Sometimes it is about more than you, and Karma is real

Throughout this journey I have been amazed at the overwhelming love and support that I have received.  I also have been blow away by all the nice things that people have done for me.  I never imagined that I would be in this situation and I have been more than appreciative for the Charity others have shown.  I think I will remember that more than the treatment itself.  

Charity comes in all different forms.  And Charity can mean a variable of meanings.  I define it as the pure love of Christ.  It is doing the right thing, being kind to one another.  Helping someone cross the street, all things that a good Southern Lady would teach you.  It can mean different things to different people.  For most it is the act of giving.  I have never viewed Charity as someone of greater means giving to someone with lesser means.  I choose not to put it in the reference of a "Charity Case".   Rather I choose to frame it as being kind to one another.  At the end of the day we are all the same, we are all people just doing our best.  At some point in everyone's life you will be in need of Charity.  

For those looking for an update on my progress, I overall have felt 90% the past week.  And maybe 90% is my new 100%?  I have an appetite but don't want to eat, eating makes me feel sick if I eat too much, so I am still figuring that out.  I have gained some of my weight back, which in the end is the right thing.  I will lose it in a more healthy way soon enough.  I did get to visit with the ENT (Ear, Nose and Throat) Doctor this week.  He removed a mole on my head that liked to bleed through most of Chemo.  While I was there I brought up the ringing in my ears and how annoying that has been.  How it causes me anxiety and is such a frustration.  He said unfortunately that is here to stay.  So I guess one of my battle wounds will be the continuous sound I hear.  Prayers and fingers crossed it goes away.  I think it has been one reason I don't sleep well anymore honestly.  He did recommend a white noise machine when I sleep, I gave it a try and I think it helped.  I need a couple nights to see how it goes.  

I also continue to struggle with staying focused.  When I am focused on something I have not noticed any problems.  But when I try to focus on several things, I will forget bits and pieces.  This is sometimes called "Chemo Brain" and I think it is getting better and better.  I have to remind myself that the effects of Chemo last well past the treatment and the cells have to rebuild themselves.  It has not even been a month yet and some of my research suggest as long as 40 days.  

Back to the topic of Charity.  As I have pondered on how I can show more Charity in my life, the concept of paying it forward continues to come to mind.  I would say as recent as 5 years ago I was a more Charitable person.  I was more active in service to other people, more active with non-profits and more involved in my community.  The only thing that has really changed is life.  I am still the same person and believe the same way I have always believed on the topic of Charity or service to others.  I just got busy and have not sought for or been given the same opportunities for service.  That needs to change for sure.  I still feel that I do show Charity for others but I am missing that service component.  The dedication and giving of my time to help others.  

So I am trying to pay forward all the kindness that has been shown me.  I am working on a couple "Boxes of Courage".  When I started Chemo on my first day I got a small cooler with a variety of items and a note from another cancer patient.  It was not much and it was fairly simple, but the meaning was powerful.  So I am going to take that and pay it forward by creating these boxes.  I plan to fill 5 gift boxes with items that I found to be helpful for me during my treatment and write a note of encouragement for the recipient.  I will give these boxes to the Cancer Institute to pass along to the next patients who start their journey.   You are all welcome to participate with me.  I welcome cards and notes of encouragement or items for the boxes.  I am going to put the basic things that are not too specific to the type of cancer and keep them general.  So mints, carmels, fragrance free lotion, hand sanitizer, thank you cards, puzzles, color books, playing cards etc.  I am also going to try to find some reusable cups that have the measurements on the side to help with tracking fluid intakes and reusable lids and straws.  And if I can find it a nice set of reusable plasticware.  

We all want the world to be a better place, and that starts with Charity.  While I am going to pay it forward more, I encourage you to do the same.  I have always loved to do a random act of kindness.  I don't want the recognition for it, and I don't want the praise. But I do believe that Karma exist in the world.  I think that doing good is rewarded in this life or the next.  I believe that if we are good people, generally good will surround us.  I joked with a friend of mine when I was telling her about getting cancer, that at some point in life I must not have helped an old lady cross the street.  And that Karma was giving me a kick in the balls for that.  While I don't support the idea that if you are only ever doing good that bad won't come you way. But I do suggest that when bad knocks on the door, there will be enough good around you to get you through it.  So the old adage that "what goes around comes around" holds some truth.  

Showing Charity does not have to be a grand gesture or one of significant monetary value or prestige.  Charity is made up of all the small and simple things we do.  Imagine if we were all a little nicer to one another.  Or showed a little more love to our neighbors.  Our world is divided more now than ever in my lifetime and were only going to get through this by showing a little more Charity.  That is on all parties to do.  If everyone just did the right thing, we would come out ahead on the other end.  But our inability to communicate and to listen has escalated our world to a new level.  

I was able to show Charity in two forms this week.  First my friend Amanda invited me over to make Halloween Decorations for her family to give to people.  She planned to simply just place them on others doorsteps.  It was simple, fun and we used all recycled materials.  Left over lumber, paint, ribbons etc.  It was really fun and enjoyable and I hope that those who got them felt a little more loved.  I brought home a couple.  

It was also Prime Day this week, and of course I bought a bunch of crap that I didn't really need.  But things I could find useful.  And when they are at a good deal you tend to buy them.  I am by no means the person who created this idea but I did put a basket of treats for the delivery team.  Speaking of why can Amazon not just deliver all my items on the same day ?  At one point I had three Amazon trucks in front of my house.  Some choose to take something and others did not.  Half of them were not even paying attention.  I even had one Amazon Driver stop on his way back up my street and get more.  Some realized I had a camera and others did not so that was a good laugh.  Pumpkin was a part of craft day with Amanda as well.  

I have always enjoyed Maya Angelou's work when it came to poetry.  It was so simple and real.  Her words had meaning and provoked thought.  She was very intelligent, she did move to North Carolina so that in itself says a lot.  I love North Carolina for those who have not figured that out.  One of her most famous quotes is about Charity.  I have included it here for those who may have never heard it or may not realize she is the author.  

 

So I want to ask that each of you take the next day, week or month and to work on showing others more Charity.  That includes strangers or people you don't know.  Were not as social as we were because Miss. Rona has put us in the corner, but we all have a neighbor, we all have that one person we know needs a little more support right now.  They might not even need anything, but you need the opportunity.  When was the last time you did service for someone else?  Do you remember?  Can you remember how it made you feel?  Maybe it is just picking up litter on the side of the road, or helping someone rake their leaves.  It could be pulling their trash can to the road for pickup.  Just love people a little more this week.  Smile behind your mask, call a co-worker you have not seen since March and ask them how they are doing.  If you want to take it a step further call that local non-profit and ask how you can help.  Buy the overpriced coffee at Starbucks for the person behind you in the drive through.  The Holidays are upon us and it is the time for giving and showing Charity.  I for one can't wait, the election should be over, and regardless of that 2020 will be over and hopefully 2021 has better Karma.  

Charity starts with you.   So ask yourself, how will you change the world today?